Monday, August 10, 2009

Comforting words

Today marks the 4th anniversary of losing my best friend and life partner to ALS, a disease that sucks the very life out of anyone it touches. I share this final letter from Bill, in the hopes that it will inspire ALS patients to take the time TODAY to write a similar note and say everything you need to say…to your partner, to your children, to your grandchildren, to your parents, to your closest friends. Ask or give forgiveness and clear the air. Tell them you love them. Share your hopes and dreams for them. Whatever you choose, it will be great!

To honor Bill’s memory, I read this letter and (kind of!) enjoy my annual shot of Jose Cuervo. I laugh and I cry, but I am always comforted and reminded of just how lucky I am to have given and received unconditional love. It’s also the reminder I need that it’s safe to come out of “the cave”.

From: William Lichtig [blicht01@pacbell.net]
Sent: Monday, July 25, 2005 10:08 PM
To: Comm
Subject: Meow.doc

Meow;

We have reached the point all too quickly in my trek to the end of my life where everything that happens to me is not just a safety issue to both of us or, a health issue to me, but it seems literally life and death now. Sucks, doesn’t it?

My outside looks almost normal to people sprinkled with an occasional thunder storm that you have weathered with strength, dignity, and conviction, much stronger than I have.

The doctors can only guesstimate and treat by what they see and measure, but the soul makes the real BIG decisions on what happens to a person.

My body has taken control of itself, away from me, so all that is left of me that I can still control is my soul, my essence if you will, and even control of that is wavering more and more on a daily, sometimes hourly basis. Everyone has told me that my landing will be peaceful and quiet, with dignity. Can I just tell you the trip is anything but, sort of like our daytrips in Mexico!

I will miss your laugh, your snuggling, but most of all, your soul, your essence, that what makes you, you.

There is so much more I could say, but you know in your heart how much I loved you, through thick and thin. The fact that you have stuck by my side throughout this ordeal, being my voice when I could not speak and my staunchest advocate, has showed me your strong will, your dedication to our relationship and most of all, your love for me.

I am extremely sorry to leave our relationship this soon and this way, but we fulfilled our vows to each other, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.

I love you.

B.

4 comments:

Jessica R said...

This is such a beautiful letter, and I admire you so much for sharing it. Your blog is always full of honesty and compassion; I stop by regularly and I am always touched and comforted by what you've written. <3

kklichtig said...

Thank you Jessica! I appreciate your kind words!

Sheila said...

Thank you for sharing such a personal letter. I had to open a new box of kleenex. I can tell that there was so much love in your relationship with your late husband and I really admire your courage and strength in light of such a devastating loss.

kklichtig said...

Thank you Sheila! You are so encouraging and I appreciate your spirit and support!